Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Dreams. Show all posts

2011-03-14

PopCo and my non functioning love life.


At the moment I feel this world is just going crazy. Everything I'm used to is gone. It feels sad in many ways. Mostly I feel a bit lost at the moment. Like I have nothing to really rely on but myself. I don't even have my own space, and that is really starting to make me frustrated now. The most reliable thing in my life at the moment is school. I could just stay there for ever. It's whats's closest to me at the moment. School and the people at school, the ones I meet almost every day, two people: Edith and Andreas. I don't see many other people at the moment, except for weekends. I miss always having someone to talk to. I miss that really badly. I'm not used to being on my own anymore. I need something to take my mind off things. What ever it may be.

Started reading PopCo today. Another book by Scarlett Thomas. Can't help loving her so much. The book starts off with a quote be Stanley Milgram. Isn't that just wonderful? It's so funny how these things happen. Just after reading "The end of Mr Y" (Another book by Thomas) that refers loads to Derida, I had to read a bit of Derida at school. Made school work loads more fun I can tell you. And now I start reading PopCo that I understand is a lot about mathematics and we are reading about statistic methods. It's just a really nice coincidence.

Otherwise I am walking arround this earth feeling extremely bored, irritated, unmotivated and unsatisfied. I need some action. I need some drama. Jesus, I am tired of this situation....

2011-02-06

Dreams...

Ok, before I forget I have to review my dream for you. I had the weirdest dream about living in a country really controlled by the government, think North Korea'ish. Like there was no internet or TV and no one knew about the outside world except for me. The dictator had his "home base" in Osaka, so I had to blow it up. The country was organized so the whole population worked at factories making trains. The dictator had control, not only over the country, but through out the world by using a secret underground train to get around. This is why the whole population worked with train manufacture. So anyhow, i had to blow up Osaka. Though it was really far away. I tried to shout out in a megaphone that I had blown up Osaka, but no one in the factory would believe me so I ended up taking the tube home from Fridhemsplan and being in a bad mood.

The scenery changed, I was on an old train from the sometime in the 50's. I was about 17 and I was a boy going to boarding school. (yeah cause these things happen in my dreams). But we had to change trains at a terminal. So we did, and then I realized I'd forgotten one of my school books on the other train. For some reason it was "Oliver Twist". It was to late to get it back though so I couldn't do much about it. So we kept going on the train. I had a really cute 50's girlfriend that i was kissing, and she was giggling. Can't remember getting to the actual boarding school. But next I realized I had been expelled for some reason. (I think it had something to do with Osaka, so maybe I blew it up after all...) I was in my room and my parents were there (except these were not my real parents, but my parents in the 50's, and i was still a school boy of 17). They were helping me pack my stuff. For some reason I only had girls clothes, but it didn't bother me thet much.

Next up I am in a shopping mall shopping for groceries for my "goodbye party" at school. I am now myself again (the year 2011, female, 22 years old). I accidentally bump into my old friend Tina. So we go shopping ingredients for my party together. The problem is we can't talk about food for some reason, so we have to guess what we are are cooking because we can't communicate. So in the end we just talk about horror literature instead.

Back at the party I am drinking cocktails and saving the swizzl sticks that are really huge and in lots of neon colours. The cocktails are really huge too. My friends are laying the table weith lots of cakes. Kerem and I decide to scare our friend Boel so we grab loads of straws and swizzle sticks and waive them around pretending to be Cthulhu. (why we do this I am not sure. But it seemed like a good idea at the time) Boel gets really scared and she is holding what she clames to be a home made chocolate cake in one hand and a birthday cake in the other. She jumps back and screams, and the cakes fly in the air. I manage to catch the chocolate one, that is not at all home made but still in wrapped in plastic from the shop where she bought it. The birthday cake on the other hand flies through the air and lands in Kerems' face.

This is where I wake up feeling kind of weird...