This night is fucked up. There is something. It has been fucked up since beginning of spring. I can't tell anyone about it, though I guess some people already know. I am so tired of being stuck in the middle of other peoples problems. That makes them my problems. Tonight I actually made my statement very clear. I don't know if it will help. And it hurts horribly. Because with this I am hurting someone else. Some secrets are not meant to be kept. Because they hurt others to much. There are three people I really wish I could talk to. But this other person has to go first. He will never get the chance. He must take the chance. And I am waiting. I have been waiting all my life. Will it ever happen?